i have been living quite sometime with a condition called delayed sleep-phase syndrome (dsps). it causes my sleep and wake times occur at inappropriate times of day. at least in the sense of happening in a manner conducive to a relatively normal life.

this causes a great deal of stress, as i have great difficulty waking in time for school/work/et cetera. similarly, i am unwillingly exempted from social endeavors. the only people i consistently associate with are people that are likewise nocturnal by nature.

i have grown to appreciate the night time: following moon phases and searching for constellations while admiring the expanses of the local arboretum after hours.

however, i am still left with an inordinate amount of time during which i am left solely to my own devices.

my days no longer make sense; every day is a struggle to fulfill my currently unidentified role in society without needing to sleep in the middle of it. time itself seems to be melting into a pool of which i know not the depth.